DISCLAIMER: My memory of Pokemon canon vs. fanon is a little hazy. There may be times that I use arguments that are never established in the games or anime canon, yet I recall to be generally accepted. Or at some point I saw and decided were really good ideas. Either/or.
I guess I should start with my first impression. When I first heard about this game, I thought to myself, "You know, it's kind of funny that they're doing this. I mean, just two years ago, Black and White came out, and I remember people comparing Team Plasma to PETA, given that they both claim to be working for the rights of Pokemon/animals. But, I'm sure that PETA isn't aware of that, since Black and White reveal at the end that Team Plasma was being manipulated all along by Ghetsis, who really just wanted to take over the world!"
Oh, by the way, there will be spoilers for Pokemon: Black and White here. Just a heads up.
But then I actually open up the game, and this is the first thing I see:
Yep, yeah, this is it. The first image I use on this thing, and it's of this. Yeah, I feel horrible.
Putting aside Prof. Juniper for a moment, let's look at that sign. 'I support Team Plasma.' Huh.
Well, I guess PETA just admitted that they agree with the villains. You heard it here, PETA sides with evil!*
So, anyway, the games starts with a screen of text. Basically, it's kinda what you'd expect from PETA's interpretation of Pokemon: Children learning to abuse animals, people think that Pokemon are only meant to be used and abused, children begin bullying each other- Wait, what?
"While Pokemon faced the worst abuses, children also started bullying each other..."
Okay, tangent time. Listen here, PETA. Bullying has always been a thing. The human need to dominate one another has always been a thing. Supposed abuse of Pokemon has nothing to do with it. Don't get me wrong, bullying is a horrible, horrible thing, but IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH POKEMON.
But let's put that aside, and get into the game itself. The game begins with Pikachu (Yes, Ash's Pikachu) deciding to liberate himself. You're instantly launched into a battle against... a horrible caricature of Cheren. Who never appears in the show. PETA, you've really got to get your continuities straight.
Now, in a normal review, I'd talk about the battle mechanics. But here, there's nothing really to say. They're fine. They SHOULD be fine, since Game Freak has been refining them for years. Pikachu has four moves, Quick Attack, Thundershock... Group Hug, and... Protest. Wow. Anyway, Group Hug and Protest are stat-dropping moves, so I didn't use much of them. Cheren, on the other hand, uses attacks like 'Tail-docking.' With a pair of shears. Wow again.
Anyway, you beat Cheren, and he goes on about how Pokemon are bred to fight, and Pikachu says that 'even you know what a weak argument that is!' which brings me to my first counter-argument: Pokemon kinda ARE bred to fight. Again, what I am about to say might not be canon, but, according to my memory, Pokemon and humans have a sort of mutually beneficial relationship. Pokemon travel with humans in order to protect them from wild Pokemon, and, in exchange, humans help Pokemon to get stronger. Why do you think that you're never allowed into the tall grass until you have your first Pokemon. I'll tell you why: wild Pokemon will RIP YOU APART. They are magnitudes stronger than any human, and as willing to harm others in self-preservation as any wild animal. So, you need Pokemon with you in order to protect yourself. Now, why do the Pokemon agree to protect you? So they can get stronger. Pokemon, at least most, have an inherit desire to become stronger; to become the strongest. And they realize that, with the right human calling the shots, they can battle much better. Not necessarily because the human is smarter, though that will likely sometimes be the case, but also because it's one less thing for the Pokemon to think about in the heat of battle. That's why trainer-owned Pokemon are always worth more EXP. They're simply more challenging opponents because of the trainer aiding them.
So, anyway, Cheren talks about how HIS Pokemon wouldn't want to leave, and Pikachu tells him to give his Tepig the choice as to whether or not she wants to travel with him. And since PETA made this game, Tepig of course decides that her trainer is evil and want to go join the Pokemon Liberation Front with Pikachu.**
Afterwards, you meet Nurse Joy, she goes on about the 'evils of exploitation,' and gives you a video which, knowing PETA, I refused to watch. Pikachu and Tepig decide to go the the Global Terminal and spread the video across all of Unova in order to increase awareness of... whatever it was in that video.
Also, I haven't mentioned it before, but Pokemon can talk in this. Yeah.
Anyway, I'm going to skip over the battle with Prof. Juniper, since all it does is give you a Snivy, and move straight on to Ghetsis. So, yeah, after I saw that Team Plasma sign earlier, I just assumed that nobody at PETA had actually played the game, and they were just going off of what they had heard. NOPE. Ghetsis actually acknowledges that he was manipulating Team Plasma, doesn't actually believe any of that, and now... skins and butchers Pokemon that are... too old to battle, I guess? And I think he does it while they're still alive too, which is sick.***
After that, you get an Oshawott that Ghetsis apparently skinned alive, and move on to the final boss... ASH KETCHUM.
I feel kinda dirty posting that.
Okay, I'm not sure PETA has ever seen an episode of Pokemon. They think Pokemon can talk, they think dresses like THAT... this is just wrong. Heck, they say that Ash keeps Pikachu in a Pokeball. He tried that once. Pikachu didn't take it too well.
Honestly, that last sentence really reflects my view on this game as a whole. Its argument lies in the fact that people are abusing Pokemon. You remember that thing I said earlier, though? The part where I talked about how Pokemon can easily kill humans? Yeah, that's why you never hear about Pokemon abusers. If anyone really tried to abuse their Pokemon, THEY WOULD GET KILLED. This isn't like a cat, where you can declaw them or something. Heck, I'm not sure humans would even HAVE any means of self-defense. I mean, the show has guns in it once or twice, but the games never mention them.
Also, the game says that Ash has never cared about Pikachu. As a response, I simply say that you should go watch the episode "Pikachu's Goodbye."
Done crying? Good. After the battle, Ash is convinced that he's been wrong, and decides to form an organization to spread the word: "Pokemon Treated Ethically, Awesome!"
Wow. Just, just wow. No, you know what? I'm done here. This rant is over. Bye.
See you later.
*Note: I am in no way saying that PETA is evil. I'm sure they're doing what they THINK is right.
**This is actually suspiciously similar to a scene in Pokemon Special, though I'll let it slide, since I doubt that anyone at PETA actually reads it.
***For those interested, I try not to think about what exactly they DO eat in Pokemon. I mean, early on the show showed non-Pokemon animals, so maybe they eat those and just don't show them? I don't know.
All images shown were made by PETA. All characters portrayed were originally created by Game Freak.
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